Because if they know you’re free, they’ll add more work, and we’re just trying to survive out here.
So, you’ve wrapped up your deliverables by 11 AM, congratulations, productivity machine! You’re feeling light, the air smells fresher, and you suddenly believe this week might not humble you.
But alas, this is Nigeria. If you look too available, they’ll remind you there’s “one quick thing” they’ve been meaning to assign since last week.
To avoid becoming a dumping ground for random tasks, here are foolproof ways to look very, very busy without actually doing much:
- The Classic Screen Stare
Keep that laptop screen on at all costs. Don’t even let it sleep or snooze before you get caught unawares. The minute it goes black, someone will suddenly remember that there’s a “small revision” that requires your soul. Just dey press your keyboard small small like say you dey debug software, meanwhile you’re still on the same email you opened two hours ago.
You don’t even have to scroll. Occasionally move your mouse or type something random. Sigh softly, nod at your screen once in a while, and look stressed in a productive way. It works. Trust me.
- The Strategic Phone Call
Pick up your phone, stand up, and act like you’re on a call with a potential client. Drop serious-sounding lines like, “let’s align on that deliverable,” “hmm, I’ll escalate that ASAP,” “Can we align this afternoon?”
Nobody is actually on the other end, it’s the energy that counts. Omo, because even if you’re just on the call with no one, the performance has to be Oscar worthy.
- Embrace the Power of Multitasking
Open tabs like say you dey run tech startup. Google Docs, LinkedIn, dashboard, even spreadsheet wey no concern you, cos the goal is to appear super busy. Switch tabs every 3- 5 minutes like you’re managing a crisis.
Once in a while, start typing vigorously, then pause and frown like something serious just occurred to you. You’re not doing anything, but you’re doing everything. Meanwhile, you’re watching “how to make fluffy pancakes” on YouTube (mute mode, of course).
- Take Regular Breaks
Waka pass HR office, sigh softly, frown small. Give off “I’m under pressure” cos that aura will shield you from new tasks. Even your team lead might say, “No need to bother them right now.”
Also, go to the kitchen or water dispenser area regularly. Engage in small talk with your colleagues, and casually throw in “Today choke, o!” Before you know, you don turn office social butterfly, you’ll get to escape your desk for a bit, and survive with gists that will last till 5pm.
Final Advice:
Looking busy is a skill. In Nigeria, na survival strategy. Because in most offices, finishing early just means “more will soon come.” You’ve done your work, so till 5PM reach, protect your peace and preserve your energy.
