December in Nigeria is a different season entirely. The roads are fuller, the potholes are angrier, and everybody suddenly has somewhere urgent to go. From “I’m going to the market” to “I’m going to see someone,” the entire country is outside.
And with that comes one guaranteed experience: traffic that will humble even the strongest spirit.
But don’t worry. There are ways to survive it without losing your mind.
Leave Your House Like You’re Traveling to Another State
If your event is for 4pm, just start dressing by 7am.
December traffic doesn’t respect anybody. Whether you’re using a car, bus, or bike, you’ll still face the same situation: the road is jammed and everybody is frustrated.
Early movement is your only real superpower.
Prepare Your Mind Before Stepping Out
December traffic is not just physical; it’s spiritual and psychological.
You need patience, inner peace, and the ability to ignore the driver shouting on the road for no reason.
Tell yourself: “Whatever happens today, I will not fight anybody.”
Always Have Entertainment
Music, podcasts, downloaded movies, games, anything that will keep you sane.
Because once you get stuck somewhere between two trailers for one hour, your phone becomes your only companion.
Even comedians can’t save you; you have to save yourself.
Carry Snacks and Water
One thing December traffic will teach you is humility.
If you leave your house without food or water, you’re on your own.
A journey meant to take 20 minutes can quickly become a 2-hour pilgrimage.
Snacks will save your life more than GPS.
Use Shortcuts, Back Routes, and “Nobody-Knows-This-Road” Roads
This is the month to trust Google Maps, your instincts, old street memories, and even that aboki that said “No pass there, go like this.”
Any road that reduces stress is welcome.
Don’t Overload Your Schedule
This is not the month to plan five events in one day.
Pick your battles.
Choose one or two outings and leave the rest.
December traffic does not allow over-sabi.
If You Can Avoid the Road, Avoid It Completely
Sometimes the best way to survive December traffic… is not to enter it at all.
Order what you can. Attend virtually if possible.
If the event isn’t compulsory, stay home and keep your sanity intact.
Mentally Prepare for Surge Prices
Bolt and Uber will show you pepper.
By the time you open the app and see the fare, you’ll start asking yourself whether the outing was even worth it.
Budget for transport stress because it is always part of the December package.
Be Generous With Patience
Drivers will misbehave.
Pedestrians will cross anyhow.
Bikes will appear from places that don’t exist.
If you don’t want to fight in public, just breathe and let everything go.
Accept That Traffic Is Inevitable
At the end of the day, December traffic is part of Detty December.
No matter how prepared you are, you’ll still experience it one way or another.
But with the right mindset and survival kit, you won’t lose your mind in the process.
December traffic is unavoidable, but your sanity doesn’t have to suffer with it. The roads will be packed, the drivers will be chaotic, and the movement will be slow, but with the right mindset and a little preparation, you can still enjoy the season without burning out. At the end of the day, traffic is part of the December experience, so accept it, plan around it, and move wisely. The goal is simple: survive the road and still have enough energy left to enjoy Detty December.
Solid write-up