Uber leaving Nigeria is actually a serious matter. With the cost of fuel, inflation and the general wahala of doing business these days, you can understand why things have gotten to this point.
But let’s be honest with ourselves.
Some of you are mourning Uber like you had a monthly subscription.Ā
You that has been entering keke, molue and korope since Adam, suddenly you’re online asking, āWhat will Nigerians do without Uber?
My sister, we both know your transport budget.
You That Usually Enter Danfo? Come and Sit Down
Uber leaving Nigeria is something we didn’t see coming, especially with how expensive transportation has become.
But you?
You that have been entering danfo since the beginning of time
Why are you tweeting like you just lost your personal driver?
Both of us know that the moment Uber price shows ā¦15k for a journey you used to pay ā¦2k for, you will quietly open Google Maps and start looking for the nearest bus stop.
Suddenly, Everybody Is an Uber Baby
The way some people are crying about Uber leaving, you’d think they were entering Uber every morning to work.
āHow will we survive without Uber?ā
My brother in suffering, we?
When last did you enter Uber?
Don’t worry, I won’t expose you.
But we both know your relationship with public transport is stronger than your relationship with Uber.
Inflation Has Entered the Chat
Let’s be serious for a minute.
Uber leaving Nigeria is not exactly surprising when you consider how expensive it has become to operate just about anything.
Fuel prices, maintenance, exchange rates and the general cost of doing business can make transportation platforms increasingly difficult to run profitably.
So yes, this one actually hurts.
But it is also funny watching people mourn a service they were already avoiding because the fare had become a personal attack.
Tomorrow, We Will See You at the Bus Stop
Let’s sha not lie to ourselves.
Uber may be leaving, but your beloved danfo is still here.
Keke is still here.
And that bus conductor shouting āOjuelegba! Ojuelegba! Last two!ā is not going anywhere.
So wipe those tears.
Adjust your shirt.
Enter the bus.
Las Las
At the end of the day, Uber leaving is definitely a big deal, especially for people who relied on it for convenience and work.
But for some of you, please dry your fake tears.
We know ourselves.
Tomorrow morning, you’ll still be at the bus stop, fighting for that last seat while the conductor is shouting: Oga, abeg shift for me
Because Uber may have left Nigeria…
But danfo never promised to leave us, it’s going NOWHERE.
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