Yes, we know Nigerian weddings are beautiful, colourful, enjoyable and all that, but omooo there are some things that just need to go in this big 2026. Speaking on behalf of myself and 99 others!
Here’s a list of things that need to retire ASAP:
1. No Asoebi, No Souvenir
Haaaaaa what do you mean by you will not give me bowl and cups, because I did not buy the Asoebi? What about the transport money I used to get there, my makeup, my new shoes and most of all, my presence!
Ohhhhh I’m not worthy to collect souvenirs because I’m not wearing the colour of the day? it’s not fair ooooo.
2.Looking at face Before serving Rice
This is the most embarrassing of all! You will carry that sweet plate of Jollof rice and pass me 10 times, you won’t even drop one for me, because I don’t look like I eat Jollof rice or what?!
That’s the highest wickedness ooo.
3.Overpricing the Asoebi
Madam, do you by any chance want us to buy or not? Tell me why three yards of your Asoebi is 2 million Naira? Yes, i know you have your target audience, but abeg! If I pay 2 million for just Asoebi, you best believe I will go home with your groom, because whyyyyy.
So, if i don’t buy your 2-million-naira Asoebi, you will not give me jollof rice or souvenir? hmm this life! my people hustle ooo.
4.Marking the face of people that didn’t spray money
After the wedding, your friends will now put up a list of people that did not spray money at your wedding! You people should free us na, even EFCC condemns spraying money, it is a crime! Do you want me to go to jail?
Abeg abeg abeg, just give me my rice and souvenirs.
Happy married life too ooo.
So, please and please, I hope you consider this appeal.
Thaanksss
0 Comments