Ekene Aka
Ready to conquer the ups and downs of navigating the vibrant chaos that is Nigeria? Buckle up for “Surviving Nigeria 101” – your go-to guide for mastering the art of living in your motherland with style and sense!, here are some tips to navigate through the madness and turn it into your playground.
Let’s kick things off with a crash course in financial sense – dodge the dreaded Sapa with a diversified portfolio and keep an eye on those OPay transactions; they’re faster than lightning. And remember, if you’re broke, own it with style!
Now, onto the streets – just something one or two for the local guards, earn some street cred, and when they say the road’s clear, trust but verify, my friend. Safety first, always.
Relationships? Ah, the minefield of “Have you eaten?” questions and the mysterious “I’m not fine” answers. Memorize this: ‘yes’ is your go-to answer, and sometimes, it’s best not to dig deeper when she says she’s not fine. Oh, and timing? Crucial, especially when sliding into DMs during her viral photo spree.
Student life? Don’t mess with your class rep; it’s academic suicide. Take control of your studies, avoid roommates if you cherish peace, and remember, God helps those who help themselves – so study up!
Police checkpoints, a saga of their own! Assume every call’s on speakerphone and greet the officers in your local dialect. Keep that 100 naira for “pure water” handy – it’s like an entry fee.
Corporate jungle? Lawyers, ensure those consultation fees hit the table first. Build your network in regulatory agencies for a smoother ride, and if a job ad starts with “We are a small team of agile engineers,” run Forrest, run!
Life in Nigeria’s a rollercoaster, but armed with these nuggets of wisdom, you’ll surf those billings, dodge those “adugbos”, and dance through the chaos like a pro!
